The Royal Wedding cartoon

The Royal Wedding

The Royal Wedding of Prince William & Kate Middleton

Wonkie feels it is time to take a welcome departure from the madness surrounding the Malema hate speech trial in South Africa. And departure too, for that matter, from the raft of other negative news splashing about the world over the last few months. Join Wonkie in marching forward to discuss an affair of regal importance – the Royal Wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton.

English newsreaders around the world breathed a sigh of relief this week. There will be at least a few days this year where they need not concentrate on pronouncing the name of a peculiar Arab leader about to ousted, a strange Japanese nuclear power plant, or some deranged African leader unhappy with his country’s election results. It’s so much easier to say Kate and William than Gbagbababogo.

Fortunately, the Royals in the UK have not wreaked havoc in their country, as much as say, the good king of Swaziland has in his. Still, there is a fair amount of anti-monarchy protest that can be expected over the next week. All-in-all, it is likely to be an event to remember for many. Wonkie fondly recalls getting a whole day off school when Prince Charles married Lady Diana on 29 July 1981.

As the guest list for the Royal Wedding has not been publicised as yet by Clarence House, the news over the last couple of days has been flooded with speculation around who might be attending. Wonkie believes both Muammar Gaddafi and Robert Mugabe are still waiting anxiously for their pale brown envelopes. Posh and Becks, and Sir Elton John, on the other hand, have been spared the pains of the African postal service – they will certainly be attending, as will James Blunt who will play the church organ at the ceremony.

The Royal Wedding will take place at Westminster Abbey on the 29th April 2011 at 11h00. Sadly, Wonkie’s royal invitation was misplaced whilst doing some charity work with the homeless orphans of inner London – if you, by any chance, have come across a pale brown envelope stating the below, then please forward it right away.

The Lord Chamberlain is commanded by the Queen to invite Wonkie to the marriage of His Royal Highness Prince William of Wales, K.G. with Miss Catherine Middleton at Westminster Abbey on Friday, 29th April, 2011 at 11.00 a.m.

Sincerely, a royal farce or not, Wonkie wishes Prince William and Kate Middleton a memorable wedding and all the very best for the future.

PS: South Africans wishing to attend the wedding ceremony should urgently contact Co-operative Governance Minister Sicelo Shiceka. He can allegedly organise amazing stuff that nobody else can dream of from public funds.

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  1. Hi Wonkie, get the scorpions to trace your invitation, we would love to see you on tv at the wedding.

  2. Ashley A.Eaton says

    What a refreshing change to the daily African continent rubbish.

  3. a break from all the bad news,

  4. Peace dont worry to finish your outfit for the wedding, they decided to use the Archbishop of Canterbury for the sermon.

  5. A Monarchy only survives because the people like ( love) it and the Monarchy responds. It cannot in the modern era exist except by force when the Monarchy oppresses such as i9n Swaziland or the Monarchy deserts them (Italy 1948). If the British had a referendum on their Monarchy they would vote overwhelmingly to keep it. Unfortunately the British Royals have little or no political weight because there are times when the Monarch needs to tell the government that they are on a wrong path or that what they are doing is not in the interest of the majority. The Royal wedding will be a great celebration of the love between the British public and and the Royal Family. It also will signify a continuation of that love.

  6. I will be attending the wedding, at home in front of the TV and my own champagne. I remember when Charles & Di got married my mom let me stay at home instead of going to school!

  7. Deena Naidoo says

    Yep, I got my pale brown envelop. From my wife demanding I sit quietly in front of the tube, shut my mouth and watch Prince Julius Malema and his future wife, Winnie Mandela tie the knot whilst the ANCYL toyi-toyi in Fiksburg.

  8. Deena Naidoo says

    Yeah Jen, we were expecting our 1st new born at that stage. I stayed home to be with my other half.

  9. I am rushing off to London to sleep on the sidewalk the night before, along with another half million or so devoted subjects, to make sure I have a spot right in front to catch a glimpse of the Royal Couple as they pass by.

  10. Its nice to know two young people are getting married and settling down. But so will thousands of others tie the knot this weekend. I wish them all the best. But I wasn’t invited, so what do I care…?

  11. Now that Peanuts informed me that I am not invited to the wedding, I will arange a royal wedding celebration in our tv lounge and invite the minister of International affairs as guest of honour with guards. Maybe they will pay for the catering (we wont charge them for the venue) and in that way we may be wasting our hard earned taxes on ourselves for a change.

  12. Guess what, I’ve been invited to the great event and I should be accompanied by my two body guards:Muarmur and Robert.See u there.

  13. Peace, you know your tv lounge is too small, have you seen how big those bodyguards are? Secondly you do not allow guns on your premises. Thirdly your driveway is far too small for their big cars. Forthly I won.t be here and hate missing out on celebrations.

  14. Amidst the horror and devastation on this planet it is so uplifting to be able to witness the marriage of a prince and his sweetheart. It is also wonderful that he has not asked her to just shack up with him as is the modern trend.

  15. “The size of the divorce and scandals to follow is in direct proportion to the scale of opulance displayed at the wedding.”
    Fieldmarshall Joe Soap Von Gota und Gorba

  16. Any news regarding the Royal Wedding is a welcome departure from the awfulvoice of Malema,singing (?) murderous songs,and being emulated by hordes of mindleless,half-educated youths.

  17. Prince William indeed looks as if he is kind hearted like his late great grandmother and mother. I do not know much about him , heard only one speech and seen a lot of photo’s over the years of him. We certainly pray that he and his bride will have a great and wonderful life together and be an example to many married couples.

  18. Hoping that the wedding will be as excited as I am. having been able to skype a facebook pal of mine in Oklahoma and see him face to face for the first time was wonderful, His accent was a bit difficult in the beginning until he started talking slowly, we chatted for 3.5 hours. They want me to spend my next vacation with them in June.July and then we will talk about me completing my studies in Oklahoma, will have to get this one past my mom. They live in the Lincoln County and says it is wonderful to live there. If I got an invitation to the wedding it would not have excited me as much as this one. Wonkie if the scorpions dont trace your envelope with your invitation that you too will get an invitation from somewhere that is exciting. All you others here on the blog may you have the same experience.

  19. I am really excited about the wedding. Good news! Kate is really good looking too.

  20. Its gona be a hell of wedding, money spenders will be there to spend, cash cash cash mmmmmmm I can smell hear, POUNDS POUNDS POUNDS. I love london!

  21. I’m waiting for the porn vid on You Tube.

  22. How I wish such a good spirit should prevail even here in Africa. May God shower this marriage with His everlasting blessings. Prince William seemed to be a nice charming young man sithi Hala.a.a.a.ala ukwanda kwaliwa ngumthakathi

  23. Iron Fist says

    It’s funny that this is like the first conversation since forever that is not controversial 🙂

  24. @Iron Fist so true! Almost Fri and the talk has not dissolved to race or religion as yet! But you have to note too that the number of comments are significantly less…but the poll was well clicked on! Seems as though ‘Seriously who cares’ is about to edge into the first place! LOL! So it could be why the talk didn’t get down to race or religion…you have to care for that to happen! LOL!

    In Trinidad there is an advertised breakfast at a hotel from 6 AM to 8 AM for people to pay TT$175 for a breakfast to watch the wedding at the hotel!

  25. Ouch!!! I missed the plane to London who wants to borrow my invitation?
    Will just have to plonk myself by the TV, should be ok may even see Kate’s dress before William , that would be a bonus for missing the plane

  26. Peanuts – sorry for you. If I leave work at 12 do you think I will make it in time to watch (still have to pick up the Champagne) so I will be home at 12.30!

  27. Hi Jen, you will at least see most of it. By the way we need to cancel our political meeting for today as the wedding is much more important. Glad to see you back.

  28. Peanuts – meeting definitely cancelled. Busy week for me I was the only one in the office. These holidays must come to and end!

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