NPC Jam cartoon

NPC Jam

NPC Jam vs Strawberry Jam

A few months ago, Wonkie published an article about South Africa’s wonderful National Planning Commission (the NPC). This government agency, supposedly responsible for strategic planning for the country, was established in May 2009. Trevor Manuel currently heads the commission with his deputy Cyril Ramaphosa.

With supreme strategic efficiency, the NPC took a couple of years to decide that it would be really good to plan to make a plan. To that end, they employed lots of external experts, possibly in a vain attempt to meet president Zuma’s optimistic job creation targets. Now, a mere 2 years and 4 months into its existence, the NPC decided to engage the public before they really start their serious planning. That, ladies and gentlemen, is the fermentation process for making the NPC Jam.

In case, like most South Africans, you have not heard about the NPC jam that took place last week, it was an online, IBM-powered, technology-enabled interaction session that truly engaged with the masses. Yes, believe it, just over 10,000 odd representative South African voices took part (because internet access and indeed the ability to read is ubiquitous in South Africa).

Now Wonkie has no problem with social inclusion and efforts by government to engage the public. Certainly the general public are more likely to have better ideas about the issues facing them than fat government officials snoozing in their ivory towers. The problem, Mr Manuel, is that everybody already knows what the problems are. They basically constitute the ticket of the ANC election campaign – job creation, education, stamping out corruption, service delivery and other such important challenges that are given more lip service than an over-enthusiastic prostitute.

Further, many of the solutions to the problems are also known – it’s just that the powers that be – i.e. the NPC and the rest of government, apparently have devised no proper, measurable plan to implement them yet. Granted that the NPC would have been unlikely to come up with an insightful suggestion to legalise weed all by themselves – so thank you South African public, for making your voices heard.

Now the process for making strawberry jam is very different. Firstly, it’s important to keep it simple and in season so you can’t plan for 2 years to make the jam. Secondly, there are plenty of really good 10 step recipes floating around, so you don’t need to redesign and reinvent the wheel. Thirdly, the jam itself is sweet, fun and anybody who wants to can eat it – not just a privileged few. Now if only there were a Strawberry Jam SETA to help the NPC with their process.

Wonkie is curious to to read your thoughts on the NPC jam and what needs to be done to fix South Africa – please take part in our poll below or leave your more detailed opinion in the comments section:

What did you think about the National Planning Commission Jam?

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If you too would like the luxury of planning for 2 years to make a plan, perhaps you need to secure your financial future first. If you’re interested, the Euromillions lottery is currently sitting at over 100 Million Euros this week – you can buy lottery ticket online here or if you’re based in India, you can visit this page instead. For those with a different risk profile, click here to try out some online casinos in India, or the best online casinos world-wide. Otherwise, visit Wonkie’s recommended pages for alternatively entertaining choices.

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Back to a serious note for a moment, Wonkie thinks the best way forward is for all government officials to experience what the general public experiences. Can you imagine blue light brigades being replaced with public transport? Or private healthcare schemes replaced by attendance at a public hospital? How about sending minister’s children to public schools? Perhaps then they might not spend a couple of years planning aimlessly and actually do what they are paid to do: deliver. Be sure you to leave your comment below – Wonkie is keen to read your opinion.

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Comments

  1. Molly Blackheart says

    Wow… sounds like a dream job – a couple of years to produce nothing of consequence and earning a fat paycheck to do that no doubt. Where do I apply… I can be a an expert, I swear I can.

  2. How could the NPC have a jam without getting their fat arses stuck? Who can do any work after that?

  3. Trevor Manuel was a good finance minster, in all he should be able to do this job with no problem. The execution is the problem as the ANC can’t organize anything probably. The NPC is just another waste of tax payer’s money, and again a few individuals enriching their own pockets – same story.

  4. NCP liftin stones, only to drop ’em on their own feet. Giv me a name of sum1 in SA who doesn’t know what pips are hopin for… Only polititians are playing pretend, hoping the problems won’t show. Well nothing had changed so far, and if they do change, its only for the worst.

  5. Hi Trevor (Cyril you are actually getting involved in this scam? Shame the hard times must be afflicting you as well.You have lost 99% of your credibility with me)
    Trevor , Trevor, Trevor,you must really believe All South Africans are suckers,illiterate , gulible and ANC members who believe any crap you can come up with .
    Although I am not Muslim I woud introduce Sharia law .Every crook in the Government ,present or past , chop their hands off .Instant job creation .Every Socialist or Communist not riding a bycicle or driving a Trabante ,you guess hands off, what about you.Not even a little finger?
    Stop the unbridlled corruption in our beloved Country , mine by choice,stop the racism,let whites participate in Government , let this Country develop ,let the children become educated , use non ANC people , teachers , educators ,stop the idiotic trade unions destroying the labour force . What about that for starters?

  6. What the heck ???????????

  7. Mr Manual if you want to create jobs help the people that’s got the skills to start
    a business .Getting money to do so is for our normal people (not prevoisly dis adantaged fat cats) is impossible.We can make a differance if we can get to the gov. tenders with out paying a bribe and actually get payed on time.

  8. Get rid of the unions, encourage people to start us small business enterprises and don’t make it so difficult for them to get rid of useless people. Fire half the government and put people in who actually know what they are doing.
    Be seen to root out corruption and for goodness sake get a ministerial handbook that does not condone whole sale stealing from the poor.
    Educate, educate and educate so that we do not again end up with generations of illiterate, disaffeted youth.

  9. In this country bananajam would be cheaper.

  10. I agree with banana jam opinion. However the way these fools make plans they may as well stick the banana up their collective arse.

  11. You cannot do that with strawberries

  12. a-maize-ingly-corny says

    @ Garth – wanna bet ??? !!!

  13. a-maize-ingly-corny says

    Cream helps !

  14. a-maize-ingly-corny says

    Where does Trevor JAM the Aardvark’s pointy nose? Maybe we should ask Cyril how he deputises for Trevor ?

  15. a-maize-ingly-corny says

    @ Garth – Re your suggestion of “sticking” the banana – would that be Manuel work – or is it something automatic ?

    By the way what is a Phosa and where does one RAM a Phosa ??

  16. karl plank says

    subject: apprenticeship
    Honourable Minister,
    I am listening to some very interesting programs on SaFm and hear a lot about jobless young people, education of our youth, homeless people, and many other subjects being dealt with.
    You deal with the education of our young generation, numerous callers and experts give their opinions and advices on the subject, free schooling, free university, equal opportunities ,but I hear no one ever speaking of “apprenticeship” which is the training for tradesmen who have & still build the countries all over the world.
    Here is my input in case it is of any value, on the above subject:
    I am 77 years of age, I have been in business in South Africa for over 50 years, during which time I have trained numerous employees in various sections of my business.
    Unfortunately, till 1994 the then prevailing law of South Africa did not allow to award trade certificates to the employees concerned, only large companies who could fulfil the requirements in law could do so. In numerous pre-1994 discussions and complaints from me with the various authorities of the labour department, I was told to follow the law, which described specifically which type of work Africans were permitted to perform and which they were not. On a number of occasions I was warned and threatened with a fine because some of my co-workers did work reserved for other race groups. This was in accordance with a law that I strongly objected to. At some stage I contracted Japanese engineers to train my co workers, which was not allowed, all expert in their field, had to leave the country.
    To this day I cannot understand why apprenticeship is not a firm policy of the government and practiced on a large scale in South Africa as is done in Europe & other countries.
    The continent of Europe was built on the strength of qualified craftsmen, which only apprenticeship can produce. Without apprenticeship, Europe’s economy would not be where it is today. Under the apprenticeship system, qualified Tradesmen and companies employing skilled labour take in and train apprentices in the 14 to 18 age group. For three years prior to taking a trade test adjudicated by experts in each trade, the apprentice receives an annually increasing wage; sufficient to provide pocket money, transport, trade school fees, uniform and a food allowance. At the end of the first generation of such a system, the country would have a pool of tradesmen and qualified people, hairdressers, mechanics, plumbers, electricians, dressmakers, printers etcetera. These people would in turn, be able to train others and build up the country in a manner that we would be proud of.
    The system is dependent on freedom from trade union influence and interference. The trade union movement in South Africa it seems to me, is more of a political force than a system designed to serve the best interest of a young apprentice. Rather apprentices should be protected from exploitation and other excesses by common law and the ministry of youth. Weekly or monthly wages would be negotiated by trade representatives, Seifsa and employers. Every apprentice goes to trade school once per week/month as stipulated by the various trade sections.
    An apprentice has no say or voting power in the company which he works in, while he is trained in. He does not strike, he takes orders from his elders and supervisors and he devotes his time and energy to learning his trade until he passes his trade test.
    A man qualified as I have described does not need state assistance at the end of his successful apprenticeship. He will be overwhelmed with job offers and business opportunities.We have thousands of willing intelligent young people to whom our present society does not extend opportunities. This is mainly because the people are unemployable, as they have been deprived the opportunity in the past to learn a trade or a marketable skill. No technikon alone or quick-fix diploma course can produce a carpenter, but any 14 year old boy, after three years apprenticeship, can build his own and his neighbour’s furniture, be independent and earn good money.
    It is heartbreaking for me to see thousands of youngsters walking the streets looking for work, to see this with my eyes, knowing what could be done, makes me want to cry. If we work together for the benefit of the next generation of willing young people, our squatter camps would be turned into sustainable, beautiful suburbs in record time.
    Furthermore, for mass employment opportunities for unskilled people, giving thousands of unemployed an income, work could be created for important and necessary national projects such as highways, streets, dams, schools, hospitals and prison buildings across the country. The great depression of Europe in the 30th should be able to show us how employment was provided to the unemployed than.
    Perhaps we should not request our education system to produce young people with an academic education only, stop telling jung people stories imported from the first world while we are still third world in productivity and capability.
    Kind regards,
    Karl E.Plank

  17. Blah, blah, blah. Cyril should stick to making hamburgers and chips and Trevor should do some manual.

  18. Hallo Mr Trevor, Ek dink die regering doen nie genoeg vir alle rasse mense nie. Ek ssal baie graag die geleentheid wil he om met u te debateur. Nou weet ek ook u gaan se u is te besig. Mnr ek werk op die grond fisies met die mense daagliks moet j’n mens aanskou hoe mense soebat en smeek vir werk. Hoe mense enigiets probeer om werk te kry net om vir hul kinders te kan sorg. Meneer praat asb met my. Daar is ‘n oplossing maar dit moet reg geimplemneteer word. Dankie Joey 071 6187077. Maar ek weet dit sal nooit gebeur dat u met ‘n gewone mens praat nie.

  19. @Joey, not a good idea to give personal details on this forum.

  20. How about Wonkie dropping this subject and giving us a good cartoon of Tutu and the Dalai Lama, that will boil the blood of Mzu and a few others who always had lite spread on their school sandwiches and therefore do not know what Jam is.

  21. a-maize-ingly-corny says

    Maybe they think that Jam is that icky stuff between the toes when you take off your dirty socks.

  22. I must repeat what I said a while ago.Zuma is not a political fool. Trevor was
    too successful, getting too popular and is of course not black enough. To get
    him out of the way give him a job that will remove him from the public eye and
    that is impossible to do.He will start getting flack and his popularity will wane.
    As George Bush said: “Mission accomplished!”

  23. a-maize-ingly-corny says

    @ Garth AND PM Dat idea is too-too good too waste. Maybe it will give da lai to da garbage being mouthed by mid-level “spokespersons” dat die crockery country is behind the “dalays”

  24. a-maize-ingly-corny says

    @ Garth AND PM Dat idea is too-too good too waste. Maybe it will give da lai to da garbage being mouthed by mid-level “spokespersons” dat die crockery country is not behind the “dalays”

  25. a-maize-ingly-corny says

    die wun wid die not is die rite wun

  26. I must agree with Karl Plank even if his comments are too long to read. The best way to get skilled people into he workplace is through an apprentice programme, not some half arsed SETA academy that produces profits for those using them. You cannot train a good artisan in 6 weeks or one lecture. It needs solid hands on experience backed up by proper testing. Otherwise we will be importing artisans as well as marmalde from Egypt. Then we really will be in a jam.

  27. a-maize-ingly-corny says

    @ Garth – I presume the marmalade is dressed in a green flag

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